Happy New Year!

1. Until recently I had membership to the university's gym. But there's only one thing more depressing than exercising next to a gaggle of skinny 19-year-olds, and that's exercising next to a gaggle of skinny 19-year-olds who ate a mince pie at Christmas and now think they're fat.

2. My decision to spend more time reading to my son seems to have coincided with a phase he's going through which involves him handing me his favourite book and waiting expectantly for me to read it to him. His favourite book is six pages long and tells the fascinating story of a little boy who eats his dinner nicely. Yesterday I read it 23 times. The book is now on top of my wardrobe. My son still covers everything within a 3 metre radius in mashed potato and refuses to eat green veg.

3. I've been running three times in the last three days. Yes, really. The doctor says I should be back on my feet in no time.

4. Why oh why did I buy so much chocolate stuff for Christmas? My whole being is shouting "I want to look skinny and smug like Gwyneth Paltrow! Give me lentil bakes and wholesome vegetable soup!" and yet somehow it's being drowned out by the stack of biscuits in the cupboard shouting "Gorge yourself! You've nothing sensible in the house to eat anyway since you've not been shopping in the last 2 weeks you lazy slut!"

5. Last night there was a programme on TV called something like "One Hundred People From 2006 Who Desperately Need A Good Slap!" Naturally, Anthea Turner was quite near the top of that list with her Perfect Housewife show, of which I was previously blissfully ignorant. So of course now I can't do anything about the embarrassing state of the house for fear that I might then have something in common with Anth.  I think I'll just learn to live with the mashed potato.

« Back